pics

Here's where I started back on Sept 17:

And here's where I was yesterday on December 12:

Miles to go? Absolutely. But a serious start.

Before and after:

And the obligatory old clothes shots...

Stats and thoughts on the project to follow after I've had a few days to digest it all.

over already?

Is today really the last day? I'm confused. This feels like it has been going on forever, but also feels like it just started. So tomorrow I have no grams? No workout pdf? Back into the real world, wow. Going to be interesting.

slacking

Not on the workouts, just on the blogging.

Yesterday was the first of the supersets. I'm a fan. Exhausted by the end of it, but like the switching around and variety. Cardio, on the other hand, still is awful. An hour a day is just too much. But not for the next two days. For two days it is perfect.

Food is good. Exercise is good. The amount of time it all takes is bad. Nothing new with all that. Heading out to workout now then there will only be two left. Awesome.

tired

Workouts continue to get harder, and more importantly longer. Taking over an hour and a half to get through it at this point. I'm back to the old standard of having zero free time. I feel the changes going on though. Lots of fat still floating around, but there's actually a frame of muscle under that now and it feels good. Just over a week left, going to finish strong.

After that is going to be a very different situation with 5 bonenkais/parties/dinners in a week. I'm really interested to see how that plays out. I'm not too worried. I don't plan on being overly conservative, I don't plan on thinking that much about it while I'm out and doing. Just in between the events eat reasonably and keep working out (just not for well over an hour a day, will be nice to get some sort of life back). I also don't think that new me will go as far off the deep end as old me did. I don't think there's anything wrong with having a total blowout once in a while, but I'm seriously out of practice.

dinner

Thanksgiving dinner last night was great. Other than one meal at Blocky's and one at Benson's this was the first meal I've had that wasn't in my apartment or at my desk since I went to HK 7 weeks ago. I was amazed at how apprehensive I was about going to a friend's house to eat, it was far too real world and out of my little bubble. It was by far the furthest off the reservation I've gone since I never took my indulgence, but it wasn't really so far off. Turkey was about the right amount of protein, went heavy on the green beans, light on the mashed potatoes, skipped the cranberry sauce and had some yams. There was some butter and salt in the food, but I didn't add any extra. Had a little bit of stuffing and a roll, but other than that it worked. Stuck to water, skipped the wine.

Would I have rather had seconds (and thirds)? Yes. Would I have liked to drown everything in gravy? Yes. Would wine have been great? Yes. Did I miss any of it that much? No.

Best of all, I didn't really have to think about it. I know what 80 grams of protein looks like. I know how much veg I need to fill me up (not that much these days). I wasn't hungry. It was awesome. I have new hope for sustainability after the project ends.

17 days left? Oh yeah, bring it on.

fuel

New diet came out today. Goodbye apple dinner, hello real food.

If I'd thought about it I would have thought I'd be excited about that, but I'm not. Very first thought was to be annoyed at having to spend time making dinner again. The last few weeks the only meal I really had to do any work for was lunch. I guess this comes back to what my top problem has been through the whole project, time management.

I don't remember the last time I was really excited about a meal. Some people in PCP have blogged about this before, the concept of food just as fuel. I understand it, but I don't much care for it. It is convenient, but I like food. I like liking food. I guess this also comes down to a matter of balance. Have good meals, just have them sparingly and eat reasonably in between.

Speaking of good meals, Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I'm going to a friend's for dinner. I can justify it half a dozen ways, but I'm not going to.

Things are going great. Workouts are still long and boring (50 mins of cardio a day now?!?), but the results keep coming. Down 14 kilos at this point, I think the last time I weighed in at these levels I was just out of college.

recovery

I was trading emails this afternoon with one of my friends who had a birthday last week. He threw a party that I skipped because a night out for dinner and boozing just isn't on the agenda right now as much as I wanted to go and celebrate with the crew. I apologized for missing the party and he said something to the effect of "No need to explain, you need to stay in the zone. Giving you a hard time for missing the party would be like offering a recovering alcoholic a tequila shot."

I'm still thinking that through. People don't (or at least I didn't) think of fat and out of shape in the same way they think of alcoholism. I'm not saying fat is a disease (at least for me it wasn't), it is more about making bad choices. Is what I'm doing really any different from an alcoholic going to rehab though? Both are about developing new habits and making a lifestyle change. One big difference is that as opposed to an alcoholic's goal to have "not one drop" I'm already doing a lot of thinking about how life works after this ends. I'm excited to go back to eating out with friends and meeting people for drinks, but I can't imagine ever going back to the way I was. It is all about striking a balance and no doubt it will take time to figure out.

Things are going well. New diet is a touch smaller than last week's, but nothing to be afraid of. Timed cardio all week again. Turns out 45 minutes a day of cardio is boring and time consuming (it takes 45 minutes!), but it sure is effective. Still failing by the end of pretty much every exercise, but getting further and further so all good.

keepin' on

The monotony continues. Missed a workout on Wednesday. Got home from work around 8, sat down for a minute, woke up around 11. I added the back exercises into yesterday's workout and the triceps into today's so I'm sorta caught up, but not really. Clearly I need to get more sleep, but that is easier said than done.

A few milestones this week. Finally got through 100 jumps in a row, only to 103 but making progress. Got my time for 2 miles under 30 minutes and for 1k down to 8:30. Not breaking any land speed records here, but it is much better than the 12 minute 1k I was doing when this started.

Has anybody looked at their current diet vs week 1 diet? I did the other day and it was downright funny. Really not hungry at the current level, but it would have freaked me out if I'd seen this at the beginning.

Only a month to go and so much progress left to make...

monotony

Blogging was easier in the beginning. More daily revelations. More things to think about. Things now are routine. Go to work, come home, workout, eat dinner, make next day's lunch, repeat.

Weekends have been relatively quiet. No going out until 4 in the morning. No going out for dinner. That said, none of this is really a bad thing. I've been in a good mood and have been feeling good, just not very interesting.

Met up with Ian today and we headed down to Yokohama to workout with Patrick. We did today's PCP workout and it wasn't awful, but I couldn't get through all of it. Chest dips were a joke, planks were their usual fail, but all of it is getting better.

Came to a scary realization on the way home. I weigh 109 kilos and have 20% visceral fat. That works out to 48 pounds of fat in my gut. 3 bowling balls. Add in a few wetsuits worth of subcutaneous fat on top of that. And this is a massive improvement over where I was 2 months ago. Wow, scary. Going to think about that when I don't feel like working out tomorrow.

not much to report

No news is good news. Meals are still fairly boring. Exercise is still hard. Jumping is getting better. After 67 I hit new high scores at 84 and 99. Then my rope broke. Going out to pick up a new one in the morning. All good.

Been a bit frustrated about lack of progress, but then realize that I'm down 9 kilos in 6 weeks. What was I expecting? What took 35 years to do doesn't get undone in 6 weeks. Came to the realization that while this will keep ramping up (and I look forward to continuing the ride) I could stop now and just continue at this level or less and would still keep moving in the right direction. That thought really set my mind at ease. I don't need to keep up this pace forever for things to be better. I think the most important thing so far is just some changing of basic habits. How, when and what to eat. Less pizza, more vegetables. Sounds so simple when you put it that way. Do some exercise. Not standing around a gym staring at machines. Just simple work.

All that said, I really want to go out to dinner and not have to cook (or blend as the case may be). Give me some Indian food, or Thai food, or a good burger. Mmm... burger.

new high score

67 is my new number to beat. 67 jumps in a row today, still making progress. At 67 I tripped and I was kinda happy about that because the legs were burning and breathing was ragged. Rock on, good stuff.

I saw a funny joke today. Ready? 5 planks for 40 seconds each! Hahahahahaha. Yeah, I thought it was funny too.

5 or 6 sets of everything. Can't do that many of most things so end up with a lot of failing. The connotation for that word is changing for me. Failing used to be something bad and to be avoided. Now it is a sign you're doing it right and burning the muscle like crazy. Feeling way too upbeat at the moment. I'm sure another crash is coming, but feeling great right now.

stepping it up

Another new week. Am I really in week 6? It doesn't feel like it has been 6 weeks. That's a good thing I guess. Things took a definite step up today. Breakfast and lunch are a bit smaller and I'm on to the apple, banana, egg, milk dinner. Is it strange that I'm actually a bit excited about the new dinner because it means a little less food prep?

On the exercise front things have definitely stepped up as well. Cardio up to 40-45 minutes a day and no new exercises, but more sets of higher reps in everything. Oy. Pushups are not my friend, but they're slowly getting better. Everything else I'm getting through most of and failing towards the end on some of them. All good.

Jumping is definitely moving in the right direction. Took a few days off of jumping because my ankle hurt. Got back involved yesterday and banged out 49 in a row during the jumping today. Major improvement over the 5-10 max I was getting a week or two ago.

dichotomy

Ups and downs, but all good.

Yesterday I got the best compliment I've had so far. Ran into a friend I haven't seen in about 6 weeks on the street. He's been out of town and I'm pretty sure he has no idea I'm doing this project. First words out of his mouth were asking me if I've lost weight. He's not the kinda guy who asks that every time he sees you, so I actually believed it. Hearing it from people who know I'm working on it is one thing, hearing it from someone who has no idea is a different story.

On the flip side I took a really good look at myself in the mirror today. I'm somewhere between huge and gigantic. I was even bigger 5 weeks ago, but there are still miles between here and any sort of normal reasonable place. Oh well. Getting from point A to point B is a process, not an event. Key is that I'm actually taking the steps to do something about it instead of just looking at that long path, deciding it is too much effort and ordering a pizza. Mmm... pizza.

Left foot started hurting yesterday, skipped the jumping. Right ankle went back to hurting today, now I'm limping again. Cut out jumping again today and did some extra jogging. Of course with the limp it was more like fast limping than jogging, but the heart was pumping and I kept going for about 40 minutes so all good. Got through the strength part of the exercise. Still failing at the end of most things, but all good. I might not be there yet, but I know how to get there.

rough week

This week was rough. Hit a total mental wall. Had some serious self pity going on, was in a pretty bad mood. Definitely helped to see that most of the PCPers had the exact same thing going on. They all summed it up well, but the thing that stood out the most in my mind was Bill's comment on Blocky's post. That post was exactly what was going on in my head that day and that one comment turned it all around.

Nobody is making me do this, this IS how I want to be spending my time. I have zero free time during the week. I'm getting nowhere near enough sleep. I have no social life right now. That all lasts for 3 months. If three months is all it takes to get myself to a better place it is a bargain. I'm within striking distance of being down to the weight I was 3 years ago which was my lightest since college. That time the weight loss was due to drinking too much and not eating very much and there was no exercise involved. This is a much healthier approach and I can see differences in my body already. With nearly two months left I should be in better shape than I've been in my entire adult life by the time this ends. After that maybe I'll do PCP in January and kick it up to the next level and maybe I won't. Either way 3 months of pain and boredom is a small price to pay.

noticing a pattern

Today was 45 minutes of jogging day. Got home from work and could not make myself go out to run. Took well over an hour of fighting with myself before I went and did it. I know I sound like a broken record, but once I got into the jog it felt great. The legs that had been burning all day calmed down. Started to feel some burn in my back (that was a first) after yesterday's incline pull-ups and lawnmowers. Did the shoulders, now they hurt - but good hurt. For some reason I was super low energy today despite the fact that unlike the PCPers I'm still eating a good amount of food. Hopefully the energy bounces back tomorrow.

time for a new rope

Friday was ok, just a late day. Got home from work about 6:30, sat down on the couch to check email and suddenly woke up about 8:30. Oops. Didn't start the workout until 9, ate dinner at 10:30. 45 minutes of jogging (fine, there was a fair amount of fast walking in there too) would have been impossible a month ago, now it is just boring. In food news I bought a steamer. Cooking veggies for dinner is suddenly a whole lot easier.

Worked out with Alex this morning. Did the jogging, skipped the steps and did some jumping instead. Turns out my rope sucks. Struggled jumping with my rope for a while then switched to his and knocked out 250 pretty easily. Managed to get over 20 in a row without too much trouble. I think my rope is too light and too short. Will be finding another one hopefully before I need to do 1000 jumps on Tuesday.

Working out with somebody else is a good thing. Time goes by faster and you push yourself a little bit harder.

try, try again

The stairs by my apartment were packed today, so did some extra running and did some jumping. The jumping is already getting a bit better. Bill mentioned doing the jumps in front of a mirror and it really helps. Max was 16 in a row, but did that twice and was consistently around 10. It really felt all around better today. The rest of the workout was ok until it ended with planks into leg-ups. Failed on both. I have no muscles in my lower abs. None.

more jumping

Like last week the Tuesday workout was basically a day off with just 500 jumps. Only the second time trying jumping, it was a little better than last week but not much. Was consistently getting 5-10 jumps, got as many as 15 in one go. Sad as that is it is a massive improvement over last week. Like a few of the other guys, my ankle is killing me. Once I get into the workout it feels ok and I managed to jump on it today without a problem, but I'm limping during the day. Hopefully it works itself out.

Exercises this week were great. Everything is burning since I'm doubled up on muscle groups each day, and it feels good. Lower abs are clearly the weak point. Hardest things to do are bicycles, leg ups and planks... all the same problem spot. The workout itself is fun, the cardio is boring... guess that's the way it is.

back in Tokyo

Got through the weekend in HK without going off the reservation, but did it by not eating enough. Skipped a few meals and parts of meals when I just couldn't find anything that worked. I was outright relieved when I got home and started cutting up vegetables for dinner. Very strange.

Went out on Saturday night with some friends to a birthday party. Sat around a bar drinking bottles of overpriced water for an hour before I bailed. Bars just aren't that entertaining when you're the only one there not drinking.

Shoulders are burning, biceps are burning, ankle is back to being in pain. Meat Loaf said it best, 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

in HK

Flew down to HK last night, spending the weekend sightseeing here with my parents.

Wednesday was a normal day. Got home too late. Started on the new set of workouts. Lunges are a whole lot harder after 20 mins of climbing stairs and leg ups manage to be even worse coming right after sit ups. I guess that's the point, all good.

Thursday was my first real disappointing day. I was at work at 6:45, home from work at 6 and needed to be on a flight at 8:30. Got to my hotel in HK just after 1am. Kept looking for a way to get the workout in and just couldn't do it. Blocky was also right. Airport terminals and airplanes are no place to try to eat healthy. Had a bit of cold soba with no sauce and an apple for dinner. Figured eating far too little was better than eating junk doused in sauces. Felt like garbage.

On a happier note did yesterday's workout this morning. I'll double up on either Sunday or Monday and do one in the morning and one at night then I'll be caught up.

Today I was introduced to the plank. I know this was Fish's favorite. I saw it on the sheet and figured how bad can 35 seconds x 3 be? Dumb question. I kept my hands loose, but they were still shaking by the end of the third set. I can only imagine once this gets into minutes instead of seconds. I feel great though!

jumping

Today was the rest day, workout was just 500 jumps. First time I've had jumping to do and I am the single most uncoordinated person on the planet. Don't think I ever got through more than 10 in a row. In the beginning I couldn't get 5, so I guess 10 by the end was some sort of progress - but not much. Oh well, I'm sure it will come sooner or later.

lethargy

Had the first round of pain today. My right ankle hurts when I put weight on it, was walking with a slight limp all day. Got home and it seemed like such a good excuse not to work out. After a while of fighting with myself and the overwhelming desire to be lethargic I put on my shorts and my sneakers and headed down to workout.

Couldn't get into a decent jogging rhythm (turns out you can't limp through a jog) so just walked fast. By the end the ankle still hurt, but actually felt better than when I started. Hit the stairs then powered through the workout. Still can't find a good place to do incline pull ups, did pull downs instead. Got through everything except for Davincis where I couldn't quite get through the last few. As always I felt great at the end of the workout. Just keep on thinking about that and remembering that I'm not going to get stronger by talking about exercising, need to get out there and do it.

milestones

2 weeks in or so, need to figure out a good way to count this.

Headed down to Yokohama for the weekly workout with Patrick. Good workout, got a preview of what next week will bring and the exercises are getting more focused, should be fun. Worked out with one of the PCPers and did his workout which was the same routine as mine with a few more reps on most of the exercises. Couldn't get through the leg-ups at the end, but what else is new? Failing after a lot more reps than I was last week, so no complaints.

Two signs of progress today. Forgot to check the numbers last week, but turns out I'm down 4.5 kilos in two weeks. Starting from a high benchmark, but must be doing something right. Second, and more exciting, the shorts I've been running in were sliding down my hips today, need to change them up. Nice to see some payoff this early in the process.

Saturdays are awesome

Weekend, nice. Got the workout done in the morning, that really changes the whole day. Was out with friends this afternoon, got home around 7 and realized I didn't need to do the workout. Surprising how big of a difference that made.

Leg ups are still awful. Standing ovations are still awesome. Still haven't found a good place to do incline pull ups, so have been subbing in rowing instead, Alex gave me a good idea on how to do them today though. The big stairs by my apartment that I've been using for stairs were crowded today, so decided to end cardio by trying jumping instead. It is absolutely impossible. Can't do 10 in a row without tripping. I see the PCP crew doing many hundreds in a row and would be worried if I didn't know a few weeks ago they couldn't do 10 in a row either. Hopefully will get the rhythm down once I really pick up the jumping later this week.

burgers

First cravings hit me today. First the guy next to me at work had fries with lunch. Not little shoestring fries, but big thick fries that were drowned in a vat of oil for far too long. First time I really wanted something off the plan. Next temptation was after the close when they started taking orders for Friday lunch. Every week the junior guy on the desk orders lunch for the desk on Friday, random junk food. This week is Firehouse burgers. Mmmm... burger. Saying no while everyone else on the desk was ordering was a bit tough, but only stung for a minute. Sitting tomorrow eating lunch out of tupperware while the rest of the desk are downing burgers will be harder. Just keep looking forward to an hour or two after the burgers when the rest of the desk are feeling lousy and have no energy and I'm feeling good. I'm going to keep telling myself that until I believe it.

too much food?

The grams are interesting. I thought once the switch went on I'd be eating less food and would be hungry. On the contrary I'm eating more than I normally do and it is almost too much. Breakfast is huge, lunch is large, dinner a bit smaller than normal. For eggs this morning I went with hard boiled and felt like Paul Newman in Cool Hand Luke trying to eat them after all the carbs and veggies.

Can definitely tell this is different food than I'm used to eating. The standard post-lunch energy drain around 2pm hasn't been there the last few days. Things are looking up.

Yesterday was a day of rest. No exercise for the first time in over a week. Not that I'm looking forward to the workouts (I'm not), but it almost felt strange skipping it yesterday. Workout was good today, starting to mix things up a bit and get more muscle groups involved. I figured out where I can anchor my band and do rowing and standing ovations, but haven't found anything good for inclined pullups yet. Will keep on looking.

the grams kick in

Went down to Yokohama yesterday and worked out with Patrick. The trek to Yokohama is a pain, but awesome to have someone showing you how things are supposed to be done. Made the move to grams, kicked the exercise up to the next level.

I'm with everyone else on the grams, it is a lot of food and a lot of cooking. Breakfast like this is going to take some getting used to. This is a full actual meal, never done that before. Like Blocky said, might need to start waking up earlier just to get through breakfast. Brought lunch with me to work for the first time ever, new habits here we come.

eating out

After a week of eating every meal except for 3 workday lunches in my apartment I decided I needed to get out for lunch today. I'm not on grams yet so still have a lot of flexibility in what I eat. I went for a walk around Akasaka looking for something that comes close to the concept of real food and realized the options were insanely slim.

The walk was an eye opener. Obviously McDonalds and Burger King were out, but there are lots of non-chain restaurants in Akasaka. Some of them need to be healthy. There is a macrobiotic place that might fit the bill, but it was closed. Some of the rest might not be horrible, but couldn't find much that would live up to even the simple standards I'm on at this point. Avoiding salt, taking it easy with oil, eating "real food" and avoiding the processed stuff. Really shouldn't be that hard.

Ended up at a sushi place, figured how bad can that be? I got a maguro set. Fish, rice, wasabi, nori... all should be ok. Skipped the miso (no idea what's actually in that) and barely touched the shoyu or gari. Talked to Benson later and he told me that shari has sugar and salt in it. D'oh! Moral of the story, eating out looks like it is off the table for a few months. I can understand why the PCPers who are traveling are having such a hard time. I'm in HK for a few days in 2 weeks, need to start thinking now about how to handle that.

time management

One week in. I've gotten the exercise in every day, but this week was easy. No work Monday and Thursday made it simple to find time for the workout. Friday I didn't get home from work until 7, dreaded working out for a bit, started the workout at 8 and ended up not making dinner until about 9:30. I suspect that's going to be more and more standard. I'm going to have to think about how to manage my time better with full work weeks coming up. I suppose the answer is to wake up earlier and get the workout out of the way early, but I really, really hate mornings.

The revelation for today was realizing that I've felt great at the end of every workout, but still dread starting them. I'm hoping at some point my brain decides this is good for me and makes me feel good and I can start looking forward to the workouts, but for now they're a chore and my brain doesn't like the idea of it.

so it begins...

Eating better, exercising, blogging. Off the booze, off the Diet Coke (that could get rough), trying a whole new thing.

It really began last Friday, but officially today was the first day. For now the diet isn't bad and the exercise is relatively simple. That said, at the end of the cardio, legs and abs I'm panting pretty hard and sweating a lot.

I guess that might be my first revelation. In the past when I've tried (half heartedly) to get in shape I haven't done that much on the diet side and have tried to ramp up the exercise beyond what I could handle. For now the diet is a bigger change than the exercise. The thing about the exercise is that it is consistent. Not 2 or 3 days a week of trying to kill myself, but 6 or 7 days a week of steady work. Looking forward to getting into the full swing of things this week.

Brian is making changes!

All of them GOOD.